you thought there was nothing worse than telemarketers...

This morning (I worked evening shift today) I received a call for "the lady of the house." The caller promised this was not a solicitation call and she would take no more than ninety seconds. She was calling from Dove Media or Dove Productions, some such organization. In a nutshell, she asked if I was concerned about the creeping edginess of movies and TV and Hollywood's refusal to produce "family-friendly" TV and movies.

I explained that I had nontraditional ideas of what was appropriate, and that I felt people should vote with their pocketbooks and fund producers of films and shows they wanted to see, and pay to see them. When she insisted that I say I was concerned and tried to pressure into accepting a call later from someone else I said I had other more serious concerns to which I gave my time and energies. When she started talking over me and got more coercive, I hung up.

Of course, after I hung up, I came up with about half a dozen things I wish I'd said:

There are plenty of family-friendly movies out there. I just saw Cars, which all of us at work agreed was a top-notch movie for everyone, and we agreed "So many of the great movies out there are G and PG." I would also have mentioned The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe (that would smoke out whether she was a sensible Christian or a paranoid ultra-fundamentalist because of the magic issue). Then I would have recommended My Neighbor Totoro, of course.

After agreeing about the inappropriateness of so many movies and shows I would have gotten specific by decrying violence in film, glorification of war and the military, and how Hollywood and the entire country should return to the core Christian values of nonviolence, equal justice and distribution of material goods, and the equality of all people.

I would have stated that the best and most profound religious film I've seen in my life is Dogma and I'd much rather have my twelve-year-old watch that than an excessively bloody movie by a fringe-ultraconservative-Catholic anti-Semite irresponsible drinker.

I would have asked her to call back when my wife was home.

Speaking of which, I'm more than a bit offended that she asked for "the lady of the house" as if dads don't give a rat's behind about what their kids watch. When I said this to Ken he replied "oh, my kid's going to watch Terminator 2 at the age of three." "And Loveless." I added.

After saying I don't watch TV I should have told her I mostly watch shonen-ai anime and then explained what it was. She'd be convinced I should never have children.

I would really, really love it if one of these people called my friend Stasa. (Though I'd feel sorry for her...)

I should add that all of the above is absolutely true, except for Ken and I letting our (as-yet-theoretical) three-year-old watch either T2 or Loveless. I firmly believe in age- and personality-appropriateness. Lots of movies are too violent for me, let alone any kid, but I know twelve- and fourteen-year-olds whom I'd allow to watch Dogma or Loveless (we would, of course, watch them together and discuss the stories afterward) if they wanted to and if I were their parent or guardian.

More stuff...

First of all, I do have compassion for Mel Gibson if he is genuinely an alcoholic and not just irresponsible (and one can't tell that even from 'news' reports), in which case I hope he seeks and finds help.

Secondly, and back on a lighter note, some more suggestions for "what to say" from my evil-minded best friend...

* Call back when one of my husbands / spouses is home.
* Sorry, I can't talk now, I was right in the middle of
[insert something pagan-sounding here] ritual.
* Actually I would prefer more edginess, my master Chthulu
likes things that way.
* Can you visit my house to discuss this in greater detail?
I can show you my dungeon too...